@samalmightysam

Century: 100 years.
Decade: 10 years
Lustrum: 5 years.
Together forever and ever and ever: 2 weeks.

@samalmightysam

I need an app that after the third time I press the snooze button, my phone pours cold water on my face.

@samalmightysam

No horror movie can surpass the sensation of touching your pockets and not feeling your cell phone.

@samalmightysam

My grandparents had a Radio and had 9 kids; My parents had a TV and had 3 kids; and I have Twitter and I think the family ends here.

@samalmightysam

Yesterday I wanted a pizza. Today I’m eating one.

Fight for your dreams.

@samalmightysam

Some people are like water balloons, they’re more fun when you throw them out the window.

@samalmightysam

My life is like that Rihanna song :work, work and work, and then I don’t understand anything else.

@samalmightysam

Don’t worry if you had a bad day, remember there are people who have their ex’s name tattooed.

@samalmightysam

What I learned from Titanic was that u need to have sex as soon as possilble with the person u like cause u never know what might happen.