Birds shit on us because we tweet better.
Me: Mom, what’s for dinner?
Mom : typing …
*goes to hell*
Mom: Fish, honey!
Me: do you love me?
Siri: I’m only your assistance.
Me: if you don’t, I will jump off a bridge.
Siri:there are two bridges near you.
What I hated the most in Facebook?
Her: Show me your pics
Son: Dad, your phone finished restarting
If I had a dollar every time my phone’s battery dies, I
Twitter should have ” Throwing tomato” button.
Him: your account was stolen!
Me: My twitter account?
Him: no your bank account!
Me: thanks God!
Kid: What’s a man?
Dad: A man is who loves unconditionally , cares about you and protects you.
Kid: When i grow up, I’ll be a man like mom