@shatty48

Don’t ever look away from a police officer. Just stare him down. You don’t wanna look suspicious.

@shatty48

Great! I just wet my pants. Now people are gonna think I spilled my drink on myself.

@shatty48

Some people are looking for the meaning of life. I’m still looking for the meaning of I licky boom boom down.

@shatty48

Now that I’ve removed my windshield wipers I shouldn’t be getting anymore parking tickets.