@sock_holliday

YouTuber: if you like this video smash that subscribe button

Hulk: way ahead of you bud

@sock_holliday

[FIRST DATE]

Me: I don’t know if you think this is weird but you remind me of my mother

Her: Can I put her picture down yet?

Me: I’ll tell you when you can put the picture down Rebecca

@sock_holliday

Boss: Can I speak to you about your recent insubordination?

Me: I don’t know, CAN you?

*High-fives high school English teacher*

@sock_holliday

‘I don’t think I’ve ever been this hungry before’

–Me, every 45 minutes

@sock_holliday

[DATE NIGHT]

Me: You and me baby

Her: Ain’t nothing but mammals?

Me: so let’s do it….?

Her: …like they do on the discovery channel!

Both of us: *hibernate for 4 months*

@sock_holliday

Prince Charming: check out the babe

Doc: oh that’s Snow White, she’s dead

Prince Charming: I should kiss her

Doc: do you really think that might bring her back to life?

Prince Charming: bring her what now?

@sock_holliday

‘What’s in the box? What’s in the box? WHATS IN THE BOX!?’ I shout. ‘Ha ha, just kidding my name is Drew and I’m your new gynaecologist’

@sock_holliday

When your relationship runs into a problem you can’t figure out, simply use BEDMAS to solve

Bacon
Eggs
Drinks
Meds
And
Sex

@sock_holliday

The same people who tell you to follow your dreams are the ones who are all ‘surprised’ when you show up to do a presentation buck naked. Do not trust these people. Stay woke and follow zero dreams.