@theroneman

Clyde: I’m looking 4 a partner. What’s ur name?
“Bonnie”
C: That ur real name?
“Nope. Jekyll Elizabeth Parker”
C: …Bonnie it is

@theroneman

[stacks of books on floor]
Impressive, son.
[son places pizza on one stack, soda & cookies on others]
“Yep; perfect height” [turns on Xbox]

@theroneman

[mom sneaks up & scares son; ruins coloring]
Narrator: Does this happen to u? Then u need…
[cut to mom jumping on 1 foot & yelling]
Legos

@theroneman

Son, there’s only one thing in life to fear.
[Car full of bears with machine guns drives by]
Son, there are only two things in life to fear.