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Page of trojansauce's best tweets

@trojansauce : if i was noah id have left geese behind

@trojansauce: [me as a poltergeist]
*putting an empty milk carton back in the fridge* ooooOooOooooo

@trojansauce: something amazing about the original ghost busters movie is that it was made in the 80s before the invention of special effects so they had to cast actual ghosts

@trojansauce: [first day as a fireman]
me: *shooting fire out of the hose instead of water* ah shoot the boss isn’t gonna be happy about that

@trojansauce: [me as a poltergeist]
*replacing the coffee with decaf* ooooOooOooooo

@trojansauce: [alien in starbucks to make a cash withdrawal]

well, the name is misleading tbh

@trojansauce: [first day as a funeral photographer]
ok now let's try a silly one

@trojansauce: [me as a computer scientist] *pouring a computer into a test tube*

@trojansauce: ME: can we pull over and get mcdonalds im hungry
KIDNAPPER: omg shut up

@trojansauce: got fired from my job in the funeral home for inventing casketball