@velvettusk: [First Date]
Sorry for the mess. My mother said pudding on a condom was important.
@velvettusk: ♫ Is this the real life?
Are you a manatee?
Let’s beat up french fries
I should lay off the LSD ♫
@velvettusk: ♫ Hey cow
You're an all star
You are grain fed
You are ground down
@velvettusk: "Eat your dinner so that lamb didn't die for nothing" - will ensure you get your daughter's helping, too.
@velvettusk: My dog is coming home from surgery today and I hope he did ok. He can’t afford another malpractice suit.
@velvettusk: If you held a gun to my head and forced me to choose Tobey Maguire's Spider-Man or Andrew Garfield's, I'd probably shit my pants.