@yoyoha

a squirt gun filled with tuna water would be a pretty devastating weapon

@yoyoha

Parenting is mostly just informing kids how many more minutes they have of something.

@yoyoha

every time the weather starts to warm up those fraps start lookin goooood

@yoyoha

Firecrackers let you know how close drunk people are to your house.

@yoyoha

“Eat her already!” – Animal watching people kissing

@yoyoha

Are there any police officers willing to come to my house in uniform and tell my kids that not listening to me is against the law

@yoyoha

Johnny Depp is proof that if you dress like you’re a member of a rock band long enough one will just form around you eventually