Cop: There’s been another break in at the bakery.
Swan: I wouldn’t know anything about it.
Cop: *hands him a bread roll*
Swan: Word at the pond is that ducks did it, but you didn’t hear it from me.
“Vitamin Water”?? Sorry bud, that exists and it’s called SOUP
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Interesting how Lassie always happens to be at the scene when a kid “falls” down a well.
You wouldn’t know her. She goes to a different Internet
I prefer the term busy professional, thank you.
Daily ‘Facts About CHEESE’
Fact About Cheese #3:
“String Cheese. Is not made of string.”
ME EVERY WEEK OF SCHOOL
Let’s vote the pool water off that celebrity diving show.
When the wife says, “Would you rather spend time with your imaginary friends than with me?” “Yeah, kind of.” Is not the right answer.
I like to whisper my questions to the Librarian so they can ask me to speak louder
Never thought I’d be the type of person who competes for attention. Then I got a cat.