@CornOnTheGoblin: °waldo at the gym° can't none of y'all spot me
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@StaceyLynne_44: If anyone needs like five things 25% done and no things 100% done, just let me know.
@MarfSalvador: me: thanks for letting me work from home boss: *turns off shower* I meant your home
@shannonlaynee: captions that need to die: "so i did a thing" "today was ok" --a photo of a situation that is clearly more than ok "he's alright I guess"
@Real_Dick_Head: *gets first nose bleed since childhood* Apparently our periods have synced, can I have some Midol and a tampon?