@CruisinSoozan: Welcome to Wednesday.
If you haven’t had a meltdown yet today, one will be assigned to you shortly.
Bonus points for tears, flinging feces, and swearing in Polish.
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@EJGomez: we tend to look past the fact the happy birthday song was probably written by someone who forgot a gift & came up with that song on the spot
@sad_tree: *sees guy ordering pizza* "With onion" (Ok) "Sausage" (Nice) "Mushroom" (Hell yea) "Chk" (Plz) "Meatballs" (Why) "Anchovies" (Ur dead to me)
@charliedelta7: Just flipped my son off behind his back because I'm an adult and don't get into arguments with 4 year olds.
@TheAlexNevil: *opens door *finds flower petals and candles leading to bedroom *calls cops to report a break in
@kendragaylord: Me: Compassion is my compass. Him: We've been lost for 3 days and you gave your coat to a bear that looked cold.
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