@Kohuneh: you eat 28 spiders in your lifetime. always 28. if you are about to die and you've only eaten 3 then 25 arrive at once

@MikeCanRant: what idiot called it a fly swatter and not a splatula?

@hazelmotes1: Today I learned that pouring water on someone who is sleeping under an electric blanket won't electrocute them. It will only make them angry

@maliagif: boy: i wished girls liked sports girl: i like sports boy: oh yeah name the blood type of the seahawks coach from the 1990s

@kentgrossarth: I just found handcuffs, a whip and a mask in my girlfriend's bedroom. I can't believe she's a super hero.