What about “BusinessMyspace”? Nah, it’s taken. Okay, what about “LinkedIn”?

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Fun tip:

Go to carnivals, scatter nuts and bolts around rides to cut down on wait times.

*thumbs up*


I wish I had remembered this was a rectal thermometer before I’d put it in my mouth for 3 minutes.


I’ve spent the better part of my marriage battling to get these two strings inside my wife’s shirt to actually stay on this hanger


No one knew she had a dental implant until it came out in a conversation.


We’ve all got that one family member who’s an embarrassment and this restraining order suggests my family’s settled on me.


Six words that strike fear in the hearts of parents everywhere:

You’ve been volunteered as a chaperone


I imagine hooking up with you would be like asparagus. I’d forget you quickly but be reminded every time I pee.