@JPLFR80: What do you mean "yogurt flavored"?! Yogurt is the stuff we have to add flavor to.
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@3sunzzz: [notice son's not home] [text] Me: IT'S AFTER MIDNIGHT! I SAID HOME BY 11! 17: You were my ride. Me: Oh. Where are you again?
@liv_thatsme: the only person who’s actually “living the dream” is the guy who watches the security camera at the grocery store & turns on the veggie spritzer the instant someone reaches for parsley