@HyenaEars

What is the term for a group of Canadians?

Is it “an apology”?

“Oh look, there goes an apology of Canadians”

You Might Also Like

@OfHella

Sometimes I think I’m pretty smart, and other times I duck when planes fly by.

@JennyJohnsonHi5

Be safe this weekend, otherwise your dumb friends will end up telling some local news reporter how you were always the “life of the party.”

@chuuew

ME: I’m so hungry I could greet a horse

FRIEND: “Eat” a horse

ME: No watch this. Hello Mr horse

HORSE: [gives me a taco]

@Peachyisk

Due to recent cutbacks the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off.

@Mimiification

When a man tells me he’s looking for a ‘real woman’ I scurry away because I’m actually three owls in a raincoat AND HE MUSTN’T FIND OUT.

@OakHill_

911: How can I help you?
Me: MY HAND IS STUCK IN THIS PRINGLES CAN… I’M PANICKING
911: Let go of the chip Sir
Me: oh, ok….all good now

@Pork_Chop_Hair

Me [crying]: I just don’t understand what I did wrong. Please let me in.

Automatic Door: Screw. You.

@jctwritesstuff

[First Date]

Him: Great dress.
Me: Oh, this?

*flips hair*
*twirls*
*skirt flares*
*foot catches*
*face plants*

Him:
Me: Hey! Come back!