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@: What she said: Honey, I have this GREAT idea.
What I heard: Honey, I have this EXPENSIVE idea.
@CherBear162: "Remember Robert from work?"
Yeah..he was a douche.
WHAT?!? OMG..He was such a nice guy!
@JimmerThatisAll: I would have retweeted that but the sun was in my eyes and I got a lot of personal problems and I'm jealous.
@WilliamRodgers: The rest of you just need to get fat because I don't feel like going to the gym anymore...
@thejessbess: Hey Guinevere *knight flips up his visor* Hast thou considered my proposal? Because *unsheathes blade* I'm sword of a big deal.
@ReginaldDennys: Based on the number of nurses on twitter, I now know why I'm bleeding to death in the ER.