@HollyMemphis: When a movie says "Based on a true story." it means this is sort of what happened but with way uglier people.
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@ojedge: WATER POLO INSTRUCTOR: "Are you sure you know what you're doing?" ME: [Adjusting the mask & snorkel on my horse] "Of course I do."
@dumbbeezie: Holiday tip. Always buy people gifts that you would like for yourself in case they piss you off before Christmas
@samdunsiger: My autocorrect changed “graphic designer” to “groaning designer.” For once, it’s not wrong.