@T_Bonezzz_: When I'm depressed I like listening to Alanis Morupset
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@TheHyyyype: [i get pulled over] cop: have you been out drinking? me: uh yeah, i'm 28, i've been out drinking literally hundreds of times
@inmybox07: You might think I’m flirting, but really those faces are just me trying to get the peanut butter off the roof of my mouth
@Maxine12333: Reached a point in my life that I have no 'bones to pick' nor 'axes to grind'. Most would call it forgiveness, I call it memory loss and it's peaceful.
@DiamondLou69: Saw a sign that read "Free Coupons". What I want to know is what kind of terrorist would hold coupons captive in the first place?