Why didn’t Harry just grab the horcruxes, fly on the giant eagles to Mordor, and have Yoda destroy them with his phaser???
When James Blunt says “I saw your face in a crowded place” it’s so outdated like wtf is a crowded place
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I wish I had remembered this was a rectal thermometer before I’d put it in my mouth for 3 minutes.
I’m pretty sure there isn’t a single Australian animal that wouldn’t look good in a top hat.
Would you also like our cheesy bread, comes with sauce?
Are you trying to sell me a side of pizza with my pizza? 2 please.
SO MUCH BLOOD!
WHY IS THIS HAPPENING?!
-It’s raining men.
I was in a gang once. We wore blue, traveled in packs, and ruled our turf with shiny instruments…wait. Band. I was in the marching band.
Hey baby, I’m like Fred Flintstone I can really make your bed-rock. Also I live in a cave and don’t have any electricity
Some people are glistening beacons of nope.
Me: You’re such a good boy.
Dog: *tail wagging* Please leave the room so I can eat the couch.
Names that sound like Tarzan describing people: