@VerbsRProudest: When someone tries to shush me by handing me a donut, I feel so conflicted.
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@matt___nelson: "Will he ever wake up?" He's been in a coma for 3 weeks but watch this. *starts playing Pitbull* *patient wakes up to turn off the music*
@Duke1173: You're telling me that you paid eight dollars for a cup of coffee... They don't put any booze in it or nothin?