TEACHER: do you know what estimate means
STUDENT: not exactly
TEACHER: yes you are right
STUDENT: about what
TEACHER: also correct
STUDENT: …i guess
TEACHER: wow you really know your stuff
When your toddlers are teenagers don’t forget to wake them at 5am because your sock came off
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prosecutor: why did you murder that man
me: i thought he was cake
prosecutor: you “thought” he was cake?
me: i hoped he was cake
cop: do you know why i pulled you over
me: [through foam mascot head] ya
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