@MouthOfSass
@BuckyIsotope
STEVE MILLER: some people call me the space cowboy
ME: dude we only did that once and we all really really regret it
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@BuckyIsotope
@li4mst3w4rt
my reaction to stepping in dog shit is identical to me logging onto facebook…
@riscfuture
Imagine if last names were invented now, so instead of “Smith” and “Baker,” we had “Frontenddeveloper” and “Socialmediaconsultant.”
@theghissilent
the battle rages on
@DoucheMcBaggus
What doesn’t kill you, forces me to reload.
@causticbob
Waterboarding at Guantanamo Bay sounds super fun if you don’t know what either of those things are.
@tsunami__7
Worst part about going to work this morning was the look on my dog’s face that said “sucks for you, I’m going back to sleep”.
@behindyourback
Twitter’s fun because everyone’s really cynical and snide about everything except *checks hand* … wrestling? that can’t be right
@WhaJoTalkinBout
waiter: do you need a minute to look over the menu?
me, researched it online: yes please
@AndreyasAsylum
I switched to watching horror movies, because literally anything is less scary.