@minkpinkustink: whoever said misery loves company spelled calories wrong
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@FatherWithTwins: Someone cut in front of me in the salad bar line today. I didn't do anything because anyone who wants a salad that badly terrifies me.
@Gre_Gone: [Wife finds me crying on kitchen floor] Me: I fell & spilled honey on myself. Wife: Me: Will you ki Wife: I'm not kissing your Honey Boo Boo
@BlindChow: You hang Up. "No you hang Up." No YOU hang Up. "No YOU hang Up." - couple fighting while hanging Pixar movie posters
@squirrel74wkgn: Don't worry guys, my wife just turned the car radio down so we shouldn't be lost much longer.