@Tups13: Why are they called library fines and not hush money?
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@geowizzacist: Me: can I start calling him 3.5 yet? Wife: do you even know his name anymore? Me: yes wife of course I know his name.
@Sarcasticsapien: Father's Day is a great time to give your father a tie so he can look extra nice at the job he settled for because you were born.
@AmericanGent69: Trader Joe’s was destined for greatness... Unlike his twin brother Sloppy Joe who was destined to work in a cafeteria for minimum wage.