Leia: I love you.
Han: I know.
[gets frozen in carbonite]
[two years pass]
Leia: WHAT THE HELL DO YOU MEAN “I KNOW?!”
Why do people knock on a locked public restroom door? And what is the person inside to say? “who is it?”
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“So, you’re going that way? Cool. Me too.”
Waiting for a mannequin with a gut so I can really see how that shirt will look on me.
“Son, hey son”
“Know why we named you Adopted?”
*Sighs* Because I’m adop-
“BECAUSE YOU’RE ADOPTED”
Good one dad
“I’m not your dad”
– Zebra walking past a self service checkout.
This is hilarious….
Only 1890’s kids will get this
ME: You’re a silly sausage aren’t you?
SAUSAGE: [peering over spectacles] I may have acted out in my youth but that’s not what defines me.
You can now take small knives with you on planes, but my 4oz bottle of mouth wash is dangerous. Got it!