I can’t believe “still uses Winamp” is a pre-existing condition now. This feels personal.
Wife text from work on Easter. “Happy Easter” quick reply as joke “I’m going to grind on you so hard” opens text.Was group family text.truth
You Might Also Like
This bum said everyone who gives him $10 gets a “special” surprise in the alley.
My gut says no……but my heart says its a puppy!
ME (drunkenly picking a fight with a cake): get out my face you jerk
CAKE: hey pal you wanna piece of me?!?
ME: ok wow now I’m conflicted
RABBIT HUSBAND: You look even better after a full day of work. I don’t know how you do it, honey.
RABBIT WIFE: They test cosmetics on me.
BREAKING: Hugh Hefner dies at 69. He was 91 years old
*checks the hip hop section*
Nope. No one named Velocirapper yet.
The horror and trauma of explaining homosexuality to a child, as told by an internet mom.
Sometimes I wish you could ask the pharmacist to “make it a double”.
Edgar Allan Poe Because Edgar Allan Got No Job
And in that moment, the Ninja Turtles realized that in a way, ALL teenagers are mutants.