@NoogsCorner: Women always complain about periods. Talk to me when ovaries become supersensitive, hang in a thin sac and you accidentally sit on them.
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@oothikicha: Guy: you've been a bad girl. Girl: yes baby, punish me. Guy: OK. *burns all her shoes*.
@Cheeseboy22: I could never join the army because I'd never be able to figure out what time it is.
@LizHackett: 1 am: can't sleep 2 am: can't sleep 3 am: can't sleep 4 am: can't sleep 5 am: can't sleep 5:57 am: falls into a deep and dreamless sleep, sleep like a tomb, cool and silent and-- 6 am: ALARM