The surgeon who worked on my shoulder said it should feel better in a week to seven days, which makes me worry.
No. Still the wrong hole.
Only ONE in each hole!
Ugh. Here! I’ll show you.
-Helping my kid put on a swimsuit.
You Might Also Like
I’m no kind of intellectual, but my sister-in-law asked if “Edgar Allen Poe wrote the Romeo and Juliet book” and my kids share that family’s genes.
I don’t often get suspicious,but squirrels rubbing their tiny hands together? I worry they won the lottery & hired a good hit & run attorney
Words are fun. A “bat” can be a piece of sports equipment or an animal. A “spirit” can be a ghost or a beverage. A “content” creator can be someone who creates videos or who walks around screaming all of the time.
Because I love being cold 95% of my life.
Boy: Daddy can you beat a vampire?
Me: Well vampires don’t exis-
Boy: Can you beat a black hole?
Me: A black hole is-
Boy: A rhino?
Me: The thi-
Boy: A T-Rex?
Boy: Mike’s dad?
Just shoveled for 30 minutes so the pizza guy could deliver my food
9: Mommy can I have a treat?
Me: It’s close to bedtime so no
9: A tiny piece?
9: A molecule? An atom?!
Me: I’m glad you’re paying attention in Science but no. Not even a quark or neutrino
9: Is that a donut?
I once pushed a shopping cart 10 miles the other direction to avoid talking to someone I knew at the grocery store.
I hate it when someone tells me something, then says “this information is not for public consumption.“
…As if I plan on eating it.