@The_MartiniGirl: Yes I am that gift that keeps on giving most people the finger.
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@Cheeseboy22: When I was a kid, there were actually six oceans: The Pacific, Atlantic, Indian, Antarctic, Arctic and Billy.
@jonnysun: sitting is bad for u, but the standing desk is all wrong. i present to u… *unveils computer hanging from ceiling with a bed underneath it*
@NakedWhiteAss: Hey guys, which cell phone provider drops the most calls? I need to get one for my mom.
@stevemarriott: Mediocrites was not the greatest hero from Greek mythology, but nor was he the worst