@louisvirtel

You can always predict what antigay protesters will say. But never how they’ll spell it.

You can always predict what antigay protesters will say. But never how they’ll spell it.

- @louisvirtel

You Might Also Like

@Molly_Kats

A drop of roof water hit my face and I reacted like it was liquid herpes.

@senderblock23

“You know who else loved carbs? Hitler.” – excerpt from my book How To Diet Through Shame & Manipulation

@_ElvishPresley_

What do we want?!

A WRITER WHO CAN WRITE SHORTER PROTEST CHANTS FOR US THAT SUCCINCTLY ILLUSTRATE OUR DEMANDS!

When do we want it?!

NOW!

@XplodingUnicorn

5-year-old: What are Nazis?

Me: Bad people who we killed a long, long time ago

5: Why were they bad?

Me: They kept correcting our grammar

@jonathantony

Age 20: “You free for lunch?”
“Yeah, meet you there now.”

Age 30: “You free for lunch?”
“Yes, let’s schedule it in for 3 weeks from now.”

@SethMacFarlane

I wish I could explain to my cat that when I sneeze it doesn’t mean the world is ending.

@totmessmom

We really need to stop with the cute names for devastating storms. Winter Storm Voldemort would be taken much more seriously.

@Mhmm_ok_sure

I’m 48 years old and I pronounce pumpkin like PUN-KIN.

Bite me.

@ParaJanitor

I love when bill collectors ask if you can borrow the money…uh I did that before and I think we both know how that turned out.