@Staggfilms: You can be rough with me - the healthcare is free. #MakeCanadaSexier
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@Vodkantots: Him: Tell me something interesting about yourself. Me: If my head got run over by a truck, it would explode like a watermelon.
@Smooheed: *walks into room to find toddler stuck upside down yelling for help* "Hold it right there baby, Mommy's just taking a quick picture"
@OBiiieeee: my last girlfriend broke up wth me after she went through my phone and i refused to tell her why i searched for goth grandpas