@Lisabug74: You ever eat fish and chips at the aquarium and get the feeling you're being watched?
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@david8hughes: God: Noah, I need an ark. Noah: Why don't you ask Joseph, the carpenter? God: Uh [huge grin] cos I'm banging his wife? [raises hand] up top?
@sammyrhodes: Watching Dora with the kids this morning. I wish her parents would just get her an iPhone.
@alexlumaga: *workers slide massive stone block into place entombing me alive* me: *finally starting to wonder if this might be a pyramid scheme*