@kimtopher22: You know that song "Happy" by Pharrell? That's how annoying I am.
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@FattMernandez: I got a bracelet that posts where I ran, and how far to facebook, and I put it on a deer. So it just looks like I'm lost in the woods.
@juliussharpe: I just saw an ad for a bulletproof briefcase. The real question is: why does your briefcase have so many enemies?
@joe_binkley: Women's deodorant: Spring Breeze, Lilac, Gentle Sunshine. Men's deodorant: Sport, Mountain, Forest Fire, Rage, Fistfight, Childhood Angst.