I forgot the word “marathon” so I called it binge running.
you say “sitting in your parents’ basement wearing pajamas” like it’s a bad thing
You Might Also Like
6: Can I have a baby sister?
Me *panicking*: Uh, well, the problem is that you can’t choose so the baby might be a boy.
6: Then can I have a turtle?
I ate the whole box of slim fast bars. So excited about how skinny I’ll be when I wake up tomorrow.
Apparently, if you put a possum in the mailbox, you’ll get a new mailman…
Productive day sketching while waiting at the DMV.
My uncle (111 M) gifted me (50 M) a ring before leaving to go travelling. A close family friend (2,019 M) told me to destroy the ring due to problematic associations with the jeweller who made it, but the ring is precious to me and I would feel guilty throwing it away. AITA?
Vandalism should be allowed on any vehicle who’s alarm has been going off for more than 5 minutes.
me: wait for what
[desert island diary – day 1]
4:15 pm: Got one call out of my cell phone before it died. Now I wait.
5:25 pm: That pizza is definitely free
The only way to make a cat like you is to cancel plans with them and ignore their text messages.