@LittleMissAngr1: You should never laminate your kill list.
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@lovejulieacafe: *Speed Dating* Him: Do you have any hobbies? Me: *tying my hair in a big knot under my chin so I look like I have a beard* "TAAA-DAAA!"
@msdanifernandez: My uber driver asked me how my day was so I opened the door and quietly rolled into the road.