@drinksmcgee: Your coworkers when you walk through the office with doughnuts.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@AaronFullerton: Actors can get political in speeches if they want. Go for it. But imagine someone winning Wimbledon & going, "Yay! I won! Save the whales!"
@NoTheOtherJohn: [Lies on resume about having gone to preschool] Boss: You're hired. Your first task is to make me a macaroni picture. Me: *eyes widen* what
@BraandoCommando: Her: I’m not going to keep pausing the movie to explain it to you Me: I just have a hard time understanding Her: they’re in that position bc he delivered the pizza but she doesn’t have any money
@LlamaInaTux: Me: I just really want to kick this habit Therapist: You want to kick nuns? Me: No, it's just an expression meaning I can't escape my addiction Theraprist: Oh, what are you addicted to? Me: punching nuns