@Kyle_Lippert: You're a dog person? *Throws a stick* Well? Aren't you going to run after it or are you cool with being a normal human that's also a liar?
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@Vivalazoso: The only thing keeping me from cutting eye holes in a newspaper to spy on people in the coffee shop is my constant lack of scissors.
@lakeanagirl: I just read an article about the dangers of drinking that scared the crap out of me. That's it. No more reading!
@RocketRankoon: My ID expired so I can only go to the liquor store where they remember me: the one where I asked the cashier out and threw up on the floor.
@fro_vo: Me: why does the ARMy use FOOT soldiers for HAND to HAND combat lol Pentagon: he's getting too close