*Toddler walks up, kisses my knee, turns away*
“Aw! Aren’t you sweet?”
*Toddler kisses refrigerator, cabinet door and dishwasher*
Him: Pack your go-bag. No nonessentials.
Like 4 of his hoodies
800 thread count sheets
You Might Also Like
I’m extremely good at being so close to getting a prediction right.
I’m like an Almostradamus.
If someone posts a picture of their kid on Facebook making a stupid face, I like to comment with, “Oh, NOW I see the resemblance!”
Perhaps Charles Manson is a selfless lover.
YOU don’t know.
Your overexposure to Korean pop music last year will be nothing compared to your overexposure to Korean nuclear radiation this year.
Gurl are you Quantum Mechanics ’cause you got 10 different interpretations of everything, none of which fully corresponds with reality.
My mom’s favorite part of my birthday is describing my birth in detail to an 18 year old waitress who is just there to get our drink order.
Cavemen who roamed the earth were Meander-thals.
Leia: This is romantic
Han: I know
Leia: Does he have to be here?
Han: It’s a life debt. You’re basically marrying us both
Kinda cool how they based an entire country off of Mexican food.