@elwaytotheend: 10 bucks says when Dora grows up, she's gonna be a drug mule.
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@nbadag: ME: here's your bday present! BUDDY: [tries to grab it but it won't budge] did u wrap your own hand flipping the bird again ME: just open it
@Papa_Mex: On the way in a fox ran across the road ahead of me...I slowed down pretty quick cuz i knew a bunch of English dudes on horses were next...
@squirrel74wkgn: If you see a man running down the street tonight, blowing a whistle & wearing a life guard shirt...don't worry, I'm just chasing my dream.
@kDuncanG: I like my women like I like my bamboo: graceful, strong, and constantly in threat of being eaten by pandas.