@MummaCrazy: 10 just informed me that exercising releases inner-dolphins. If that's not a reason to exercise, then I don't know what is.
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@radstunts: have u ever just taken your goth girlfriend out on a date but it gets dark out and you lose her in the parking lot
@touchmybobby: as a job-stealing immigrant, I now have 36 jobs and counting. I keep them in my basement like some kind of job dragon. what you gonna do
@ieatanddrink: Think I nailed my job interview today because I wore a graduation cap to make it look like I graduated high school