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@iwearaonesie: "UNLESS WE'RE OUT OF CHEESE THERE'S NO REASON TO SCREAM LIKE THAT!" - me to my kid whenever he throws a tantrum
@DavidKrap: Dear people who question why girls go to the bathroom together, Hermione went alone and got attacked by a troll.
@Manda_like_wine: My 4yo just came into the living room, crying, "I don't want Santa to see me when I poo."
@KarenKilgariff: FAKE BREEDS I'VE TOLD PEOPLE MY DOG IS AT THE DOG PARK: Venetian Dabney, Brown Feta, Waxbeard, Oxnard Pike, Blue Hustler, High Presbyterian