@HuffPostComedy: 14 Valentine's Day jokes that laugh in the face of Cupid
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@KeetPotato: never trust a person who says they don't like chocolate, even dogs eat chocolate and it kills them
@HonestToddler: They’re saying I put a stuffed animal in the toilet. Untrue. I sent it on a mission to retrieve my toy cars.
@iwearaonesie: cost of the ice cream my kid threw a tantrum in the grocery store to get: $5 the look on his face when I ate it for dinner: priceless