@aneesa_p: <--- 30 year old female who STILL snickers when the elevator door opens & the electronic voice says "going down". Never gets old.
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@Home_Halfway: WIFE: I love you NEIL DEGRASSE TYSON: Actually it's just emotional comfort after years of being toget- WIFE: *packing* I'll be at my mothers
@envydatropic: You know the jack in a box that scared the life out of you when you were a child? That's me as an adult cooking with my smoke detector
@bombsydoll: Problem: I hate peeing alone, sleeping, & nobody talks to me about random nonsense Solution: kids
@AmishPornStar1: Never judge a book by its cover... Take it to dinner and see how it treats the waitstaff, then judge it.