@TheAlexNevil: 4 said he went potty and I asked if it was number one or number two. He said number 7, and now I'm terrified to go into the bathroom.
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@preritpathak: Therapist: Problem? Me: I always quote Eminem lyrics. T: Explain? M: I can't tell you what it really is,I can only tell u what it feels like
@AaronFullerton: Did you know you can actually WIN Instagram by taking a picture of your feet next to your dinner at sunset?
@mantej: God was truly looking out for me today — I opened a bag of air and found a few Lay’s potato chips inside.
@NOTVIKING: her: we even finish each other’s s- me: -omebody once told me the world is gonna roll me I ain't the sharpest tool in the shed she was looki