@mjkspeaks: [on phone with attorney]
HIM: you're being charged for murder.
ME: damn that sounds expensive i guess you can just put it on my Amex
@BritishNicx: Me: Oh yeah, baby. Tie me up and put a blindfold on me...Grrrr.
Him: Erm...I'm only here to rob the bank...and I have a boyfriend.
@cbdoubleu: Hulk Hogan: I struggled to overcome manic-depression.
Me [as his therapist]: So you could say you had to wrestle mania?
*gets leg dropped*
@miss_foofoo: I never understood why people get buried in suits. When I die bury me in my PJ's. If I'm gonna be sleeping that long I wanna be comfortable.
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