@1Happytwit: 6yo's can't go to jail so I have no idea why this one's refusing to drive me home from the pub.
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@BwanaChris: My ex asked me what would make her new shoes look more sexy. "Give them to your sister," was apparently a relationship breaking answer
@huntigula: [1st date] Her: so u play piano? Him: yep Her: is it hard? Him: that's pretty forward but yeah, as a rock Her: I meant playing piano Him: oh
@daemonic3: Ok, milk... Check! Potato salad... Check! Tomatoes... Check! "Sir, can you wait for the total and just write one check please?"
@Book_Krazy: *sees neighbor put his garbage in our trash can* ME: *goes to find hub* "You know what makes me mad?" HUB: *points to self*