@theshamingofjay: 75% of my day consists of looking at the clock and not believing it
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@DevilryFun: My doctor said to have a reasonable meal for dinner, so I talked some sense into my pizza.
@AndrewNadeau0: ME: Table…table doesn't look great JESUS: Through me you will have eternal life ME: ok cool but you SPECIFICALLY said you were a carpenter
@JohnHilsen: Did you know that Mark Zuckerberg and the guy who played the blue Power Ranger are cousins? Just not to each other. But they are cousins.