@theshamingofjay: 75% of my day consists of looking at the clock and not believing it
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@ojedge: *turns up to a yoga class in full Master Yoda costume* "Oh dear. Misread the flyer, I have."
@maurajbg: ME: Say "Anagrams are stupid" one more time & I will rearrange your face. YOU: Anagrams are stupid. ME: You farce.
@MarkAgee: "Pres. Trump, how do you plan to respond to this attack on our soil?" TRUMP: OK first, I've seen several people call me Tronald Dump online
@NintenDom: Rick Astley will let you borrow any movie from his Pixar collection except for one. He's never gonna give you Up.