@_thatigirl: 83 yo man, "You speak pretty good English for a Chinese girl". Me: "I'm caucasian". Him, "Well, any kind of Asian looks Chinese to me".
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@iliezabeth: DRAGON: get AWAY from me ME: let me pet ur scales pls DRAGON: I don't even KNOW u ME: breathe fire on me DRAGON: *is creeped out*
@stockejock: Fool me once shame on you, Unless you're speaking Spanish, then that's eleven times and I probably deserved it.
@ceejoyner: Throw a baby badger so high that when it lands on your enemy it's fully grown and very upset. You left town years ago. The perfect crime.
@crylenol: BAE: come over BATMAN: i'm fighting crime BAE: my parents aren't home BATMAN: *tears up* same