@julie2288: 90% of parenting is giving up the last fried cheese stick to your kid and pretending you're OK with it.
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@wolfpupy: [david attenborough voice] wolves, also known as nature's best animal, have been cool for hundreds of thousands of years
@thatdutchperson: [cooking class] "Did you put your tray in the oven, sir?" [mouth filled with raw cookie dough] I can explain
@ieatanddrink: This is your pilot speaking. We'll be taking off shortly once our flight crew confirms that this is, in fact, an airplane