@t0shiba: 90 people have swine flu and everybody wants to wear a mask. A million people have AIDS and nobody wants to wear a condom.
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@JosesLovesYou: [at sheep farm] Me: So how do you get steel wool? Farmer: well, that we get from our metal sheep Me: huh? *sheep walks by with Slayer shirt
@1800Randy: My kids are playing cowboys and Indians. One is pretending to ride a horse and shoot stuff, the other is providing tech support.